Farewell, Fam: With Love and Gratitude

I “officially” joined the BBP fam in August 2010, when I came on as a volunteer inspired by the transformative vision of building a world where masculinity can not only be beautiful but liberatory. It was inspiring to engage in critical dialogue and practice around the intersections of my masculinity, feminism, blackness, and queerness with others, instead of alone in my head. Before BBP, I often felt there was no place for me – my complexity, my desire to no longer be complicit in patriarchy while at the same time embracing my masculinity.

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“They” and the Emotional Weight of Words

Language is the space in which we carve a place for ourselves, where we demand to be seen. A reflection point for culture, community, and family to acknowledge our existence on our terms. For decades, “butch” was the only identity and term available to those of us who identified as “masculine of center.” Like many others, I lived in that space. There was much about it that I loved: the community of brotherhood, the worship of femininity, the gentility of the old-school butches. Yet, like so many other words, butch failed to capture the full depth of my soul. Its White cultural origins and resulting denial of my Black body took its toll.

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